Mentoring vs. Coaching

Mentoring vs. Coaching

Mentoring and coaching are valuable development tools and processes with many similarities. The desired outcomes from coaching and mentoring are usually closely aligned, but the approach and methods can vary significantly. They share many foundational aspects, including…

Blazing Your Path Toward Self Development

Blazing Your Path Toward Self Development

There are many things in our lives that may serve as the impetus for a renewed “Self-Development Effort,” or what I’ll refer to as an “SDE.”  A New Year’s resolution, a promotion, taking on a new professional position, perhaps a significant life change or family transition, just to name a few.  Like most, I can reflect on scores, if not a few hundred “SDEs” in my life.  What I have learned is…

It’s The Little Things That Count

In a season that encourages us to pause, reflect, and treasure the blessings of others in our lives, make a special point this year to extend that consideration to your professional relationships as well.  Through our interactions with others, we learn, grow, and excel in ways that we could never accomplish alone.  Yet do we fully appreciate those relationships?  Do we purposefully spend the necessary time and energy to nurture those relationships and give back?

Author Stephen Covey once observed “in relationships, the little things are the big things”.  Reflect on your experiences.  Don’t we know this to be true?  Yet often we don’t make the ‘little things’ a priority.  Sometimes we recognize the shortfall and attempt to make a grand gesture instead, to make up for the deficit.  However well intended, we soon realize we have completely missed the mark. 

In my journey, I’ve been most impressed with the leaders that recognized and committed to doing those little things exceptionally well.  Here are a few best practices I’ve gleaned from them over the years:

  • Time is precious.  It is the only commodity in our lives we can’t create more of.  How we spend it is a direct reflection of who we are and what we stand for.  It is also recognized as a true gift by others.  To spend a few moments with others, shows you sincerely care and value your relationship with them.  In those moments, focus on being truly present, with no distractions from phones, clocks, and other distractions.

  • Recognize efforts and reward results.  Both are important.  To recognize and respect diligence, commitment and sacrifice toward important objectives encourages us.  Doing so in front of the team is powerful recognition of an individual’s contributions and motivates all. 

A colleague of mine, widely recognized for her outstanding leadership, handed out gold star pins to recognize excellence.  A simple gesture that rekindles the feeling from our early elementary school days in a lighthearted but meaningful way.  ‘Corny’ you might think?  But I saw firsthand the pride in her team members in receiving these.  It wasn’t the value of the award; it was the recognition that mattered.

  • Impromptu check-Ins with your team members.  Be aware of and ask about key interests in team members’ lives from previous conversations.  Showing sincere interest in the things that matter most to us is powerful.  It may be as simple as inquiring about a hobby or passion we enjoy in our lives.  US President Theodore Roosevelt once remarked “people don’t care what you know until they know that you care.”  Experience has shown me that truer words have never been spoken.

  • Ask others, ‘what do you think’?  This simple phrase provides us important perspectives and details we may have lacked when facing decisions.  It also conveys a sense of trust and respect in their knowledge or viewpoint.  As a rather junior leader, I experienced the power of this firsthand.  I’m not sure how helpful my input was, but just being asked had a lasting and powerful impact on the kind of leader I wanted to become.

  • Listen, period.  Too many times, we find ourselves listening to respond, not “seeking first to understand, then be understood”.  Intently listening, fully engaged and absent of distraction is too often in very short supply.  Looking at people when they speak, with appropriate eye contact and positive body language, conveys respect, appreciation, and sincere interest.  It shows we care and appreciate the person with whom we are interacting.  There is no greater compliment per unit time than being truly listened to.

  • Say ‘thank you’ often and in meaningful ways.  While technology facilitates many ways to do this, such as emails and texts, I’ve found the time-honored practice of handwritten notes to be the best.  Yes, it takes more time.  But the recipients understand that the giving of one’s time is a gift as well, which adds to the depth of the recognition.  And, if you are like many of us, those handwritten notes are still with us many years later, serving as a proud remembrance.

None of these best practices is complex or difficult.  But, if you have personally experienced these from a leader in your professional journey, you immediately recognize the impact and profound effect they have.  It truly is all about the ‘little things!’

Authored by: Jeff Boyer, Managing Director

Get Real. It’s Better for Everyone.

Get Real.  It’s Better for Everyone.

For my last several years in uniform I repeatedly heard, “You don’t act like a colonel.” You can read that any number of ways, and the speaker would realize it, typically following up on the assertion with, “No, no, that’s a GOOD thing.” I always took it as a…

Leadership is about relationships, not power

Leadership is about relationships, not power

I really like Stephan Pastis’ comic strip “Pearls Before Swine” because it’s clever and funny when he isn’t making horrible puns. The strip has it’s main characters like Goat, Rat, and Pig but there are some other characters that occasionally make an appearance like The Wise Ass on the Hill. The character is, you guessed it, the proverbial wise person sitting on a hill dispensing wisdom to those willing to make the journey. The insights from the Wise Ass are normally enough to make me smile though I occasionally cringe because he hits too close to home.

Goal Setting vs Trend Setting

Goal Setting vs Trend Setting

We hear it all the time from our family, friends, and peers. What are your goals? Did you succeed? Even better, what about their reactions to our answers. “Whoa, that’s quite ambitious of you,” and in doing so, planting the seed of doubt that our eyes might be bigger than our stomach.

Sharpening Leadership Skills through Volunteering

Sharpening Leadership Skills through Volunteering

Volunteering—particularly with an industry or professional organization provides an opportunity to develop leadership skills in many ways. Seasoned professionals will often find time to volunteer and contribute in specialized ways, but if you’re looking for…

CHOOSING THE RIGHT PLACE TO BE AT THE RIGHT TIME

CHOOSING THE RIGHT PLACE TO BE AT THE RIGHT TIME

Early in military service, leaders teach and reinforce the concept of service members showing up to the right place, at the right time, in the right uniform, with a good attitude. This simple method of discipline is so essential to an effective (note not efficient) military organization that it is universal across initial training. In many cases, instructors…

Gratitude and Appreciation: Force Multipliers

Gratitude and Appreciation: Force Multipliers

This article tells no grand story of leadership failure or triumph. It has no references to a Harvard Business School article, the latest leadership book, or other conventional sources. Instead, this writing aims to share…

Feedback at Its Finest: Both Honest and Kind

Feedback at Its Finest: Both Honest and Kind

As you reflect on the wisdom and counsel you have received over the years, what are the most memorable? Take a moment. Not just the ‘good’ ones, but the truly stop-you-in-your-tracks, I’ve-got-to-think-about-this-more-deeply’ kind. Hopefully, you’ve had at least a few of these. Let me tell you about one that still stands out for me, from a while back, but is now maybe more important than ever before.

Decision-Making 101

Decision-Making 101

I can’t help but notice over the last several years the basics of decision-making appear not so basic anymore. One thing is for certain, we’re all faced with important decisions, personally and/or professionally. In my opinion, such an important thing merits universal basics to apply.

Focus and Direction

Focus and Direction

There is a rule of thumb known as the 1 in 60 rule in aviation. It states that for every 1 degree a plane veers off its intended course, it will miss its target destination by one mile for every sixty miles flown.

How to Embrace ‘Tabula Rasa’ and Prepare for a New Year

How to Embrace ‘Tabula Rasa’ and Prepare for a New Year

Every New Year gives us a chance for a fresh start and to build on the momentum from the previous 12 months. It’s a chance for leaders at all levels to reflect, assess and set new goals for the coming year.

The calendar, after all, is an artifice. Like the clock, it is a device we use to…


Three Leadership Killers: Pride, Judgment, and Comparison

Three Leadership Killers: Pride, Judgment, and Comparison

Self-awareness is one of the most important things in being a leader worth following, particularly if seeking to be known as a true servant leader. Knowing your strengths, weaknesses, and even your emotional vulnerabilities is vital to successfully “walk your talk” as a leader. At this point in my life, career, and journey as a leader, I can reflect…

Abolishing Negativity From Your Life

Abolishing Negativity From Your Life

The beautiful thing about “choice” is that you always have the power to decide how you are going to respond, react, and think. A few years ago, I had a colleague and friend named, Mike, tell me a story of when he went to visit his good friend, Roger and his family for the first time in New Jersey. Mike was a mentor…